Dec 28th 2011

Well its been a while since I posted so I thought that I would pop in and let you all know that I now officially have absolutely NO FLUID in my band and I have been enjoying a christmas of real food rather than having to mush it like I have in previous years....oh and no milk required either it was a beer for Santa this year. 

I consiously made the choice that I would allow myself to enjoy the festive season in its entirity, to eat, to drink and to be merry without the stress of what food group it falls into, how many calories it has in it and any other associated guilt AND it has been wonderful.

In saying that though I also made a plan that once I have my little 'holiday' that I will be straight back into business as usual come the 3rd of Jan 2012 and I have to admitt that I am really looking forward to the fresh start.

What about you did you eat, drink and be merry or did you allow the dreaded 'd' word to spoil the fun?

Read more "Dec 28th 2011"

A Rant...

I am really really freaking annoyed at the fact that so many people that I know who have lapbands  and have had awesome results are now back into triple figures because their bands have stuffed up. 

OK I get that the reason for getting the band in the first place is because we couldn't do it on our own but some of these people that I am annoyed with have gone on to become Personal Trainers and so have learnt the tools they need to make a difference and yet instead of making the change they are whinging and making pathetic excuses. 

Seriously, quit sooking that your 'band is broken', stop shoving shit into your mouth and get up off your arse and move it.

I get that its hard...I have had my band stuff up (mostly from my own actions) and also suffered (suffering) depression BUT I chose to change my life, I chose to be healthy and I chose to not make excuses.

Now before you say oh but your band isn't broken blah blah blah....No, its not but it is also not doing all the work for me, I have learnt that you can't rely on the band to do it all you have to help it along by exercising and eating right!

With or without the band its a choice that you make....you either do it or you don't and if you don't then you stay FAT - simple! 

Don't get me wrong, I am far from perfect, I have days when I am lazy, I have days when I choose to just mope around feeling sorry for myself, I have days when I eat crap....BUT it is NOT everyday, I don't allow it to be my reality.  You choose who, what and where you want to be.....if you don't like something then CHANGE IT!! 

Only YOU can make it happen!! The question is....how badly do you want it? 

When my first band stuffed up I went off the rails in a big way and put on a stack of weight and even now I am 10kg from my goal of a healthy BMI (due to going off the rails WITH a working band - its easy to cheat) and yes it SUCKS, and yes it gets me down BUT rather than allow it to consume me I choose to STOP it before it got out of control!  I don't want to get any bigger than I am, I don't want to be that fat person again and so I have promised myself that it wont happen and it wont!

Do you want to be Fat?  Do you want that huge bowl of pasta more than a healthy weight? Is that block of chocolate worth going up a dress size for? Do you want to be the one everyone looks at with pitty?

I do not mean to offend anyone with this post and if I have then there is obviously some truth in what I have said for it to have made an impact or else you wouldn't have given it a second thought.

I can remember a time when I would of been offended and hurt but still continued to make excuses rather than listen to what was being said because it was too hard.  But isn't it hard enough living with self hate and disgust everyday?  I much prefer the path of Healthy Nutrition and Exercise and yes somedays it is bloody hard but I can now look in the mirror and say "Yeah, you're alright".  Can you?

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Day 7, Week 4..SUNDAY

So as you know from the last post I have been feeling rather BLAH the past couple of weeks and as a result have been emotional eating and then feeling quilty because of it and so then of course eating my guilt....you know what I'm saying  - that vicious cycle of self sabbotage!

Anyway, I was talking to a friend of mine the other day and she said to me "Why don't you just allow yourself to feel this way and accept that feeding the soul is part of that experience"...WELL talk about a light bulb moment! 

So long story short I have done just that.  I have allowed myself to feel the way I have been feeling without feeling guilty for it.  Why do I have to be so positive and cheery all the time?  Why can't I have a shitty week and admitt that yes its a shitty week?  Why can't I eat foods that make me feel warm and comforted?  Why can't I take a week off Gym ifI need to? 

I CAN!!!!!!!!!!! and I can do it WITHOUT the GUILT!

And now here I am....warts and all but comfortable with that fact!

So whilst I am not feeling 100%  I am feeling more postive about turning this situation around and heading back to the land of positive change and empowerment!  I won't lie to you, I am exhausted and stressed but its my own fault because I am so particular about stuff and also because I continue to take on more and more because the more I do the more important and fulfilled I feel......Is that why??  Could I feel like that without doing anything?

Hmmmm,  I think that I will leave the rest for another blog as that has just opened another can of worms entirely and I could delete it but I have decided not too as its obviously an important part of this process, but for now it can just wait!

Ok anyway there are postive steps being taken!!

So on another note, this week I have had a couple of Gigs and I just want to say that MUSIC has been my saving grace - it has been the one thing that has lifted my spirits each and everytime.  I LOVE performing, I LOVE writing, I LOVE singing.

I was rehearsing the other night and out of the blue I realised how totally blessed am I to be able to do what I do! What a gift it is to be able to sing and play guitar and express myself in song.  I LOVE that MUSIC is part of who I am! =)

Read more "Day 7, Week 4..SUNDAY"

Day 2, Week 4 - Melbourne Cup Day

An update which is unfortunately not a positive one...

I quite often hold off on posting blogs like this one because as I have mentioned previously I 'try' to always be positive but today I decided too bad - I am human and that means I too have days where I just feel like shit and today I am going to admitt it rather than try to hide it - I FEEL LIKE SHIT!! 

I have no motivation to do anything (its 10:30am and I am still in bed), my house looks like a bomb has hit it, I have washing piled up and I just simply can't be stuffed doing any of it!  I just want to stay here under the covers and hide away!

This feeling started last week, Week 3 which I have to sadly say was a complete write off as yes I did succumb to the pressure of emotional/comfort eating which has only made me feel like a big fat lump of poo and I have a pimple to show for it - which is a rare occurance!

Even my tummy was against me last week and was so bloated that I looked pregnant!! I mean come on, I didnt even look pregnant when I was bloody pregnant....oh well the joys of being female, thank goddness its finally gone down now that my moontime has arrived - late as usual!

*Sigh*, On top of feeling like this my boys have been sick, especially little Jazz who has even had me up at all hours of the morning making a mad dash to the emergency department - Asthma SUCKS!  So lack of sleep has not been helpful and yes its showing - I look like crap!

Anyway, I plan on turning this feeling around as much as possible today by firstly getting up out of this bed and cleaning my house, doing my washing, going shopping, getting my self organised for the remainder of the week ahead and then study and life! 

I am feeling so bombarded with everything at the moment, I can't believe that its nearly the end of the year.  I am so far behing on my school work its not funny (life takes over - I now have 10 clients on top of my job at the paper which has also increased in hours and ofcourse family and friends too) and I want to finish by the end of the year so that means I cannot afford to be a slack arse like I am right now!  School has been really good and are putting on intensive module workshops everyday over November/December so that people who are behind can catch up but that means I need to shuffle my life around so that my mornings are free.

I don't mean to complain about it because its great that business is good its just tough juggling it all, adnd yes its what I choose to do but sometimes I wish I could just pick 1 thing to focus on and stick to it.  Photography/Journalism, Music, PT, Massage, Nutrition.  I know, I know it won't happen - I'm too passionate about all of them and as a friend of mine said to me a couple of weeks ago - I'm not someone who is just one thing, I'm all of them, they are all me.

PAUSE....

I just got a phone call from Jimi the Music Man to do some Jammin' with him, what an awesome opportunity - OK this is the motivation I need to stop feeling sorry for myself and get my life in order!!  Time to get out of bed.

Thanks for listening to me ramble! xox

Read more "Day 2, Week 4 - Melbourne Cup Day"

So far, So good!!

Well its Week 2,  Day 5 of the Empowerment Challenge and as the saying goes....So far, So good!!

I have noticed some really POSITIVE changes in my attitude towards ME, one of which includes being able to look in the mirror and find things to smile about which is a huge accomplishment.

Today I said out loud that I really like my calf muscles...

Even Glenn commented the other day that I 'looked' as though I felt good about myself, he said that I've been standing taller.  I was so shocked that he noticed and made sure I told him that it was a really nice thing to say because YES he was right. 

Mind you, I had just finished a kick butt Personal Training Session which he came and 'watched'.  It was funny actually because at one point I caught him looking at me shaking his head and when we got out he said "Damn girl, keep that up and you'll be stronger than me".  I just said you bet your arse I will be hehehehe!

I am a WINNER...even with a dorky smile hehe!

Now don't get me wrong, there are still things that I need to work on like dealing with my loose skin issues for instance, but I refuse to let them overtake the positives and will eventally also tackle those demons especially the fact that I think people won't take me seriously as a Trainer because I don't LOOK like a trainer!

This particular issue came up for me on Monday when I did a Yoga Class at the Bacchus Marsh Leisure Centre (in front of mirrors on the stage) as a fill in for Toni's Body Balance class.  Toni is a pocket rocket who looks amazing and then there's me!  Hmmm, see still demons and self doubt but they will be banished soon enough,  I have 4 more fill in sessions to take so that gives me time to work through them.

So anyway back to the positives as small steps = big victories!

If you think my rolls make a difference in my role - KISS THIS!

  

I have also noticed that my general outlook on life has shifted.  I have always tried to be a postive person but lately its not so much a matter of 'trying' its just who I am and how it is.  I realise that you cannot be positive 100% of the time (as the above clearly showed) because such is the duality of life - balance is needed to create harmony.  BUT, how long you choose to stay in that place of negativity before turning the situation around is another question and this is where I am finding that EMPOWERMENT plays a part! 

For Example:  Last week I LOST 1.7kg, which I was overjoyed about as it was an awesome first week result!  Today however, (and yes I know its early and so a 'NoNo') I hopped on the scales and it hasn't moved off the 86.1kg from Monday.  My first reaction was to step off and get back on again just in case it didn't read properly but after doing it for the third time there was no mistaking the reading and so I just had to accept it.

I won't lie to you, at first I was pissed off and started with the whole "if you hadn't of eaten this and that last week then maybe it would be different" and then next came the "I have worked my arse off for nothing blah blah blah". 

BUT, then I remembered my promise to myself and the fact that this time around the challenge isn't about a 'number' it is about Empowerment and I realised that by allowing the scales to dictate my happiness level for the day I was surrendering my power - which is not going to happen!

I SURE AM - This number does not define me!

Goals revisited....

If you read my last blog you would of noticed that I set myself goals for the first week and also for the 8 weeks (committments).

I am happy to say that 'most' of the Week 1 goals were achieved and the committments are also doing well.  Some of them however are still more of a work in progress due to me deciding that it was more important to be kind to myself rather than pushing too hard too fast as I want this to be a LIFESTYLE CHANGE rather than just something I do for the next 8 weeks.

My eating habbits have improved heaps and although there were a couple of endulgences I believe that it will be what makes this time around the one that works.  If I feel like it, I'm going to have it as long as its in moderation and not for emotional comfort as food is not the answer.

I did my PT sessions with Steve at the new PT Studio on Monday and Thursday last week and only Monday this week.  I have to say that I love feeling STRONG.  I am now up to 17.5kg free weights for upright rows which is half way through the rack.  I have decided to take on the extra PT session fortnightly as a little extra boost.

I have found my Gym Mojo again (well not today but I worked out at home instead) and it feels soooo good.  My knee has caused some frustration but its been holding up which is good - wearing 2 braces for extra support has made a huge difference to reducing the pain to enable me to do more.  I go back to the surgeons on Thursday. 

I didn't finish my massage modules, which meant no exam :( but I have 1 month until the next assessment and I will be ready for it, NO If's, But's or Maybe's.  I am hoping that Glenn will take the boys out on Sunday so I can have a FULL STUDY day!

OMG I have cut down my sugar and am suprised at how easy it has been.  I am actually considering cuttng it out completely.

Organising all of my training sessions in advance (with a back up plan) has made a world of difference to the flow of my week and also the training sessions themselves so I am going to continue this for sure.

Balance has been one of those ups and down things which is frustrating, but sometimes life throws some curve balls (little adventures, outings) and you just have to deal with it the best way you can. 

On Thursday night I went out to the Music Showcase and loved every minute of being on stage.  Part of that was because Jimi got up with me and added a whole new dymanic to my music which was amazing.  I am so excited at the thought of getting together to see where this will take us - the festival circuit sounds good to me,

As Saturday was such a lovely day I ditched the housework and spent the day with Tash and the boys instead which was lovely.  I really love spending time getting to know her more so it was worth being behind the eight ball.

Oh and then Sunday was the car show and shopping and so I didn't get to my housework until late, which meant I was up until stupid o'clock (a bit like right now hmmm).

Despite all those side tracks I managed to catch up and this week has been running smoothly.  I love it when my house is clean as I feel so much more in control, its that whole internal reflecting external thing....or is it the other way around? I do have some paperwork to catch up on but I will get there.

Well that's it for now....I will post a blog soon with some rewards that I will be giving myself, I'm still not 100% sure on what they are but I have some doozie ideas.  Will I be game enough to follow through?  That is the question.  Has that sparked your interest?  Make sure you stay tuned for more!

Thanks for reading and for the support, its means heaps.  MWAH XOX

Read more "So far, So good!!"

Goals and Committments

Task 1:  Write a list of goals that you want to achieve in the 1st week of the 8WEC.

• Get my nutrition back on track
• 2 X PT Sessions
• 2 X Gym Sessions (Aqua / Gym Floor)
• Finish Massage Modules
• Cut down from 2 sugars to 1
• Organise all my training sessions in advance with a back up plan if needed
• Maintain Balance (Family, Work, Friends)
• Start self love exercises

Task 2:  Write a list of goals that you want to achieve by the end of 8WEC.

Empowerment Contract

I, Natasha Hurst agree to work towards a Fitter, Stronger, Healthier version of myself which inturn will provide me with a feeling of Empowerment. 

I am committed to achieveing this goal with the use of healthy food and exercise and promise myself that I will not slip into negative patterns of bahaviour as they are destructive.

I am committed to praising myself for even the smallest of achivements as I have earnt it.  eg.  a loss is a loss no matter how big or small as I am committed to not allowing a figure on the scales to determine whether it is a good or a bad day.

I am committed to following a healthy nutrition plan consisting of 5-6 small meals per day with a minimum of 1200 calories and I am committed to not over endulging.

I am committed to allowing myself 1 free meal per week and will not feel guilty for doing so.

I am committed to reducing my sugar intake in my tea/coffee from 2 to 1 (in the first couple of weeks) and then switching to Natvia (a natural sweetener).

I am committed to forgiving myself for any slip ups that I may experience along the way no matter how big or small and agree that I will not allow them to trigger any self sabbotage (in its various forms eg. emotional eating binge), instead I will pick myself up dust off and get straight back on the wagon.

I am committed to exercising for a minimum of 30 minutes 6 days per week which includes 1 X P/T Session and 2 X Gym Sessions per week. 

I am committed to allowing my body to have 1 day of rest.

I am committed to maintaining a food, exercise and mood journal and to blogging my journey on a regular basis as doing this makes me more accountable for my actions.

I am committed to making time to study so that by the end of the 8 weeks I will have completed all modules for Cert 3 & 4 in Fitness, Cert 3 in Massage and Cert 3 in Nutrition.  By doing this it will provide me with more opportunity/options for my future and is an important step towards empowerment.

I am committed to giving myself adequate rest and will ensure that I am in bed with lights out by 11pm on weeknights.

I am committed to hyrdrating my body by drinking at least 1 - 2 bottles of water per day.

I am committed to stepping out of my comfort zone and embracing change.

I am committed to accepting the limitations that my knee has produced and be kind to my self.  Should I experience pain I will STOP as it is not my friend and will only cause more injury.

I am committed to not making any excuses.

I am committed to loving myself for who I am nomatter what shape or size I am and will look in the mirror everyday and say "I love you Natasha Hurst, you are beautiful to me".

As a reward for all these committments I will be the best version of myself possible which in turn makes me a better person all round (mother, partner, daughter, sister, friend, trainer).

Signed

Natasha Hurst

10 October 2011

I would like to say Thank you to Tanja Louise for sharing the idea of this contract.  I came across Tanja's page through the Aim Train and have been inspired by her weight loss journey.  Click HERE to visit Tanja's Facebook.

Read more "Goals and Committments"

Time for an Update

So for the past week I have been writting a blog in my head which goes something a little like this.....

I am so completely and utterly disgusted in myself because I have put on weight and so I feel like a total hyercrite, I'm over my knee not enabling me to do the kind of exercise I want, I am sick of this and over that and blah blah blah - insert negative self talk here and while I'm at it lets insert the putting down of ones self here too *sigh* *grumble* *sob*!!

As you can see it has all been nothing but NEGATIVE CRAP and so I can tell you right now that  the blog I had intended to post will not be the one I sit here and write!    There will be no negative self talk or self sabbotage from this point on as it is energy depleteing and does not serve a purpose in my life. 

I choose only to focuses on positivity, and anything or anyone that does not fit within this framework shall be burnt at the stake. Hmm perhaps a little melodramantic but you get my point - Its time to "STOP MAKING EXCUSES"!!

So with that said I am very much looking forward to the next phase of my journey - An 8 week Challenge to Empowerment!!

I could rattle of a list of goals focused around weight loss (getting to 74kg would be nice), measurement and size reduction (comfortable 12-14) as well as a heap of fitness goals (increase strength and stamina) but they are not the 'main' objective.  My aim is Empowerment, Strength and Health, anything else that happens along the way will be an added bonus.

Something that I am very excited about is that I will be sharing this challenge with one of my personal training clients - Tash, who in a short time has already broken through many barriers and seen improvements - you can read all about her journey HERE.  Not only is Tash one of my clients but I am very happy to say that we are fast becoming really good friends and share many of the same interests (some of which are music and craft) and values - which is always a good foundation =)

Well I think I will leave it there for now, I will be sure to come by again very soon (before starting day on Monday) to post some "Starting Stats" as regardless of whether or not its the focus, its always good to have a starting point in which to look back on.  There will also be some other information on mini goal posts!

Before I go though I would like to share some Personal news:  My son Ace (7) lost his very first tooth today, he is so excited that he gets MONEY tonight from the Tooth Fairy.  Oooh, what is the going rate these days?

Read more "Time for an Update"

Guess What?? Tue 6 Sept 2011

So here I was thinking that I had maintained in the last month (clothes test) BUT I braved the scales today and I have actually LOST 2kg's (I now weigh 84.1kg)!!!  I was so shocked that I checked it 3 times LOL.  I am SO happy, its the little boost I need to keep me strong!  Goes to show hey, that Nutrition plays a HUGE role in it all.

I managed to walk the kids to school today which felt really great, not only because I was up and about but also because I got to share a special moment with my boys.  Today was the first day that Ace rode his bike to school without training wheels and the first day that Jazz rode his with only one wheel on. Ace did so well but Jazz on the other hand stacked it a couple of times. I have really missed being able to run around with them the way I normally do and so to be able to do this with them really made my day - not to mention theirs also. =)

I am feeling much better today and have so far had a very productive start to the week.  The house is sparkling, the clothes are washed, folded and put away, the shopping has been done, the bills have all been paid, and now I get to spend my time finalising things for Relay For Life, putting my set list together, doing business accounts, lodging our tax returns and ofcourse Studying as well as a myriad of other things - there is never a dull moment in the life of Ms Tashua!

Read more "Guess What?? Tue 6 Sept 2011"

Monday September 5th 2011

Hmmmmm, I seriously don't even know where to start with this update?  The past month has been crappy to say the least, just one thing after the bloody other (capped off with Fathers Day) and to be totally honest with you,  I spent the weekend in bed with a bad case of the FML's and those that know me, know that I don't do FML's - feeling sorry for myself on occassion 'yes' but not FML's. 

Anyway after giving myself a peep talk along the lines of 'there are people out there that have it worse than you do so get over yourself' I came to realise that if nothing else, this past month has made me stronger and more determined to achieve everything that I want to achieve as well as shedding the light on a few other things too, but thats a whole other blog or three.

So you know that I had my knee done and it turned out to be worse than expected and that I was waiting to see the surgeon...Well, the verdict is that I do infact need a Full Knee Reconstruction - yipee NOT!  Firstly though its 2 months of intense physio, a brace and then back to the surgeon to book me in for the first part of the op.  Yes he will be doing it in stages.  WHY? Because he feels it will be best. *Sigh* 

On a plus I am walking around more (without my sticks) and can drive again so life has been able to get back to some kind of normal - all except for Gym. *Another Sigh* 

Whilst I have managed to maintain my weight I feel Fat and Frumpy and Blah and really need to start getting active again as I miss the Gym and being able to participate in the workout with my PT clients (who would of ever though hey!).  Although my knee has healed enough to allow me to do modified activity the rest of what life has thown at me has prevented it from happening.

So as you can guess I was feeling ultra frustrated at not being able to do things the way I usually did them and as a result of this I started grinding my teeth which fractured a tooth killing the nerve and creating an abess which saw the RHS of my face blow up like a balloon.  The pain was so intense,  worse than anything I have ever experienced (I would rather give birth and go through a tummy tuck all over again and thats saying something).  

I woke up in pain on the Thursday (after the funeral) and went to the dentist on Tuesday only to be sent home again as they weren't able to take it out because of the infection.  Luckily I self medicated with antibiotics I had left over from my last dental visit and it meant that I was able to get the sucker pulled out on the Friday.  A dislocated jaw and 4 lots of needles later OUT it came!  

Relief?? I hear you ask, umm NO! The infection on the nerve still hadn't healed and also the infection spread into the sinuses so it also became a medical problem as well as a dental one. So that meant more anitibiotics for me and stronger drugs too (this at least got me doing a little happy dance).

So a week later I was up and about again until ACHOO!! Yep you guessed it I GOT THE FLU!  Can you believe it,  Im on two lots of antibiotics and I still get bloody sick - seriously come on! 

So now my nose is running, my throat has razor blades in it, my voice is almost non existant and my chest is so bloody tight that I run out of breath walking to the toilet (insert nebuliser here). **Triple Sigh**

So there you have it....one thing after the other.  I am hoping that since there has been 3 things that there is nothing else to come as I really am well and truly over it - I want my life back. 

Anyway as I said earlier theres others out there that have it worse than I do....

Some people don't have a knee to get fixed, Some people don't have teeth to give them trouble and some people need to be on a machine to breathe all the time not just when they have the flu - so really I've got nothing to complain about. 

Oh well, as the saying goes 'What doesn't kill you makes you stronger' - in which case I think I should try out for the next strong man games LOL!

Thats all for now (I hope), I will be back again really soon to fill you in on my revelations!

Read more "Monday September 5th 2011"

Knee Update - 1 week and 1 day after

It is 1 week and 1 day since my Knee Op and recovery is coming along SLOWLY but surely...

Here is what it looked like on Day 4

I will admitt that unfortunately my recovery has been hindered (I ripped out one of my stitches) because of me being me and doing a little too much too quickly - like cleaning my house on Sunday for instance.  In my defence Glenn was being a sook and whinging about having to do everything and so I got sick of the crap and decided to just do it my bloody self! Backfired on him really because the past couple of days he's had to do even more.  Do you think he will appreciate everything I do now?  Hmmmm!

Anyway on top of that I took a different pain medication that kept me up all night and then I also went out for lunch on Monday (which is all that has kept me from going completely insane this past week so totally worth it).  Anyway no lectures needed as I have paid for it enough since. 

Tuesday and Wednesday were spent sleeping, sleeping, sleeping and yes you guessed it more sleeping as a result of stronger pain meds and from just generally feeing completely drained.  The only thing that I managed to do on the Wednesday was take 2 PT sessions and that involved me sitting down and giving orders - something totally foreign to me.

Today I am happy to say has seen me staying awake and although the pain was stronger (I reduced the pain meds) I managed to make it through and got some much needed study done and even took another PT this evening.

On the Food and Exercise Front, my Nutrition hasn't been too crash hot (very little - apart from chocolate) but Glenn said last night that my face and neck had thinned out and despite the no exercise (uncless you count holding the mitts) I do feel lighter.  Not the best way of doing it I know and as a result I have been getting more heartburn.  Next week I will have more mobility so will make more of an effort to eat regulary and healthily.

Tomorrow my Mum is going to be my Chauffer for the day and so I am heading out to do my Baby Pictures and also some other odds and ends and I cannot wait. 

Saturday I have a doctors appointment to get the stitches out which will make getting around alot easier.  I will take another photo for you then!

PERSONAL NOTE: 

On Monday afternoon one of our very close family friends passed away without any warning.  This touched me very deeply and emotionally I was a mess.  I believe that this was also the reason for my deep slumber state on Tuesday and Wednesday. 

R.I.P Aunty Lesley I will always remember you as the best Donkey impersonater ever.

Read more "Knee Update - 1 week and 1 day after"

"Knee Day" Came and Went

Hi All,  Just a quick message as my happy pills have started to kick in and all the letters are starting to blend into one big kalidescope looking thing LOL!

I had my knee operation on Wednesday and on top of the Arthroscope I also needed to have a Lateral Release as it was a little messier than he first thought.  Watch a video of Arthroscopy with Lateral Release HERE

I will also need to go back under again to have my patella fixed as he said that it is very unstable.  As yet I am unsure what that will involve as I was too out of it to ask any questions, but for now recovering from this op is my first priority anyhow.

On the recovery side of things apart from my blood pressure being low (hence why I am so pale - see picture below) and ofcourse the pain which is to be expected (and being managed by happy pills), I am doing OK and am even managing to hobble around slowly - no marthons just yet (dizzy spells are another side effect of low blood pressure).

My little boy Ace (7) is sick with a Lung Infection and so he and I have been spending our days snuggling which has been lovely - but I am hoping that he feels better soon now that he has antibiotics.

Anyway, this evening I had a teary moment where I was feeling sore and sorry for myself but I got this message from my Personal Trainer giving me the kick up the butt I needed...

'You are tough, there isn't much that will stop you except for you feeling sorry for yourself so SNAP OUT OF IT!'

I sent him a message saying thank you and that's what I pay ya for LOL, nice to know he can kick my butt even when hes not torturing me in the gym.

Well everyone, time for me to go riding on my magic carpet to enter La La Land.  Will keep you updated!

xoxo

Read more ""Knee Day" Came and Went"

Monday August 1, 2011

I don't exactly know where to even begin with this blog as the past month has been one of so many ups and downs that it has left me feeling somewhat numb to the whole thing - I am, or more to the point I 'was' (I kicked my own butt back into gear this morning) in a state of 'I don't really give a shit' and yet still going through the motions - well kind of anyway (In other words it was half arsed!).

My nutrition has been appauling (too little due to lapband, too much due to emotional baggage and just generally not giving a toss) and as a result my body has been lacking energy which means that my training hasn't been as consistant as it usally is (only 3 days rather than 6) and I have also been sick more often - suprise! suprise!

I haven't been on the scales or done any measurements as I am pretty sure that they would have definitely gone up but in saying that I don't feel that it would be by a 'huge' amount or maybe thats just wishful thinking.

Anyway, I just wanted to touch base and let you know whats been going on before I go in and have my knee operated on.  Only 2 more sleeps to go!!  

So, its time to stop self sabbotaging and get proactive.  I have booked in a PT for today and also tomorrow (weights, weights and more weights - leg work!!), which will tie me over until I get the all clear to be able to train again (Walking, Aqua and Upper).   I will also be going grocery shopping to stock up on lots of nourishing food so that my recovery process is quicker. 

Well thats it for now, its nice to feel like a give a shit again!

PS.  I have to mention how hypercrital I have been feeling.  It was hard to be in the head space I was in and yet still motivate others to achieve their goals!  But, I guess that's all part of the journey and what makes me so awesome at my job (even if I do say so myself :oP).

Read more "Monday August 1, 2011"

Sunday 11 July 2011

So much for updating this blog regulary...seriously time is going way too bloody fast.

Anyway just a quick update as I have a cold and am feeling like crapola :o(

I managed to reach my target 1kg (+) loss in week 1 despite a big night of champagne and baileys at Kerriann's 40th Birthday Party.  All I can say is thank goodness for fun and friendly 'Just Dance' competitions to burn off unwanted calories!

Unfortunately week 2 I believe will not see the same positive results.  Firstly my food intake has been horrible as the band has been a prick so I am pretty much just eating anything it allows me to keep in, when it decides to let me keep it in.  Secondly, the only day of  'proper' exercise I have managed to do was my PT session which I struggled with despite the weights being lower than the previous weeks (FOOD! makes a big difference).  I say 'proper' exercise because whilst I didn't do a session of my own I did participate in some of the sessions I took with my clients.  I could blame my lack of exercise on School Holidays but it wouldn't be truth as there are always options and besides that we all know that there are NO EXCUSES!

Anyway, as I am sick I will not be weighing in this week as I believe that nurturing rather than torturing myself is the way to go, so my plan of attack is....

Food - Protein Shakes, Soups, Purees, Mush. (Try to get in the GOOD Food).

Exercise - At least 30 minutes of low - moderate intensity (every day).

REST!

And on that note....until next time!

Read more "Sunday 11 July 2011"

Persistance and Consistency

I was sent an email this week reminding me that 'Results come from persistance and consistency' and so despite just wanting to crawl into bed I pushed myself to do my 30 minuntes of cardio. I only did 15 minutes on the bike tonight as my toosh was a little sore, so for the other 15 I did the WII Fitness Coach - Hi Lo Aerobic Workout. Since I had already set it all up I also did another 15 of core work followed by 15 of Yoga and then some meditation (which was bliss). So, for someone who couldn't be buggered because she was (and still is) buggered I think I kicked butt. 

Oh and on top of all that this morning I did an Upper Body PT session where I chest Pressed 55kg - my heaviest yet =). Gotta say it was an awesome feeling especially considering that at my current weight my weight loss is 43.2kg.

I brought a Jacket and Dress (Both Size 14) on line and unfortunately they are tight across the shoulders and arms. At first I was a little upset thinking that a Size 14 didn't fit BUT it was only those areas and so there isn't much that I can do about being broad and given the choice of having muscle or not having muscle - having muscle wins hands down. So anyway this afternoon I tried them on to show Kerri and we both ended up in fits of laughter because we also realised that the arms are ridiculously too short - oh the joys of having monkey arms LOL! 

Anyway its time for me to just veg out....I have a PT session to take at 9am in the morning!

Read more "Persistance and Consistency"

Popcorn - 0 V's Me - 2 Whoo Hoo!

So today was my special catch up day with Sharon and off to the movies we went.  The first thing that hit me as I walked up the stairs was the delicious smell of popcorn...BUT, my will power was strong and so it was only a small coke zero for me (big mistake as I need to pee half way through LOL).  Anyway as if that wasn't enough of a test my hubby decided to come and sit on the bed next to me tonight while he was eating -  yes you guessed it Buttered Popcorn....Arrrrhhhh.  So after repeating the phrase 'Nothing tastes as good as being skinny feels' over and over in my head and trying to block out the 'eat me' aromas wafting in my direction I finally just asked nicely if he could please go into another room as it was incredibly hard for me to resist and HE DID!  No arguments or remarks about me being silly he just up and went into the kitchen.  Talk about shocked, I expected to need to be able to give him this longwinded explanation which I was ready to give of course!  Anyway I just wanted to share because for those of you who don't know I LOVE! LOVE! LOVE! Buttered Popcorn it is my number one treat food and I can eat a Bucket of it on my own in one sitting...so I have moved moutains today and am SO PROUD OF ME!!

So another thing that happened to me today was that I went into City Chic to look for a dress for my sisters engagement...anyway the sales girl came up to me and said (in a really nice suprised I was there in the first place kind of way),  "Excuse me hun' but I think you are too skinny to find anything in here".  At first I was like nah its all good but then a few more searches I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror and thought hmmm ok I think shes right!

Random:  This morning I brought a stranger a coffee! She wanted to pay for her order with a credit card but they didn't have eftpos and there was no teller close by. She looked so disappointed so I decided to just buy it for her....she was so suprised and very appreciative. I made sure to let her know it was her turn to pay it forward of which she agreed to do, even though she was new to the idea. =)

Anyway I have a biggie tomorrow PT, Cycle, 2 x back to back Impact Sessions (which I love doing - what an awesome and rewarding job it is) and possibly another Gym Session later in the evening so I am going to try and get some sleep - Goodnight!!

OOOOHHHHH 1 more thing.....I weighed in today and it was 84.7 a loss of 1.6kg in 1 day, so I think my scales are well and truly stuffed - Stupid things.  I wonder what they will say tomorrow LOL!

Ooooh Ok another thing (last one I promise) - My Lapband was a prick tonight so dinner went in and came out again which means my calorie intake was only 800 and my exercise calories were 400.  Another thing I noticed tonight was that while I was teaching Yoga in some of the tummy postures my port was hurting like heck!  Something to keep an eye on.

Read more "Popcorn - 0 V's Me - 2 Whoo Hoo!"

Day 1, Week 6 of Aim to Change

I am so ready to get back on track.  Not that I fell off the rails 'completely' (not far off though to be honest) but I have been complacent and now with only 5 weeks until I get my knee operated on its time to kick some butt - my butt LOL!

I weighed in on my scales this morning and the reading was 86.3kg - you can imagine my devastation.  Anyway then I weighed in this afternoon (after breakfast and snacks and fully dressed with shoes) and I weighed 84kg - WTF?  Come to think of it last week my scales were higher than those at the Lapband clinic too and I weighed later in the afternoon after eating and fully dressed that day also.  TIME FOR NEW SCALES!!

So anyway I have decided to ignore them both and just set myself a mini challenge of 5kg's in 5weeks - anything more than that will be an added bonus!

I have made the following committments to myself:

I will do a min. of 30 minutes cardio 6 days per week

I will do 1 x P/T session per week (resistance training)

I will do a min. of 3 x Gym sessions per week (1 x resistance, 1 x Aqua, 1 x Free)

I will have 1 rest day per week

I will eat lean and clean

I will allow myself 1 free meal per week

I will switch my sugar for natvia

I will drink at least 1 bottle of water per day

Today was a biggie but a goodie, even though Kerri well and truly wore me out with a 1.5hour gym session on top of my 2 Impact Fitness and Wellbeing Training Sessions LOL!  Needless to say that my exercise calories for today are 1055 not including my incidentals like walking to and from school.

Food wise today I am happy that I managed to get in all my meals (although I couldn't stomach my protein (pork) at dinner).  You can view my food diary HERE.

I had a podiatrist appointment this morning for my Plantar Fasciltis and so I am now off to have physio and to also see the orthopedic surgeon.  As much as I am hoping that physio will be the answer it was them that referred me to the podiatrist in the first place hmmm.  If they do choose to operate hopefully they can fix it at the same time as my knee.  I guess we will find out soon enough, in the meantime I will keep on keeping on.

Well I am going to leave it at that for this evening as I want to watch Rescue Special Ops and really need to start getting to bed before Midnight again.

Tomorrow I am heading out to spend the day with Sharon (one of my good friends that I haven't seen in ages) and as excited as I am, I am also nervous about the nutrition side of things as we are heading to the movies....need I say more!  I AM STRONG AND NOTHING TASTES AS GOOD AS BEING SKINNY FEELS!!

Read more "Day 1, Week 6 of Aim to Change"

Day 5,Week 5 - Aim to Change

Ok ok so I know that I say this alot but OMGosh where does the time go - seriously; the past week and a bit has flown and I am only just catching up to it.  Admittedly my baby boy turning 6 on Sunday threw me through a loop *sigh*.

So, I'm not going to go into a long boring update but I will say that whilst things on the food/exercise front haven't been perfect, they could be worse. 

I had a lapband adjustment yesterday of .5ml added and so far I have experienced a little more restriction - not as much as I would like though but its something.  My port site is really sore and I'm bruised - different specialist :(

 

I have taken two Yoga classes this week, one of which I shared with Glenn and felt so happy to have him there even though its not his thing because he thinks its not manly enough hhmmm.  On top of the Yoga I have also taken some training sessions and again Glenn was a part of one of them and let me just say if looks could kill - from one extreme to the other LOL!

I have been doing 1 PT session a week of weights - alternating between upper and lower...today was lower so I have a feeling that sitting on the loo in the next day or two will be a little on the ouch side.  Gotta say though that as much as it feckin' hurts I love the burn!

The biggest thing for me this week is the realisation that I can do a Full ROM Push-Up!!  Actually I can do a couple in a row - how awesome is that!  When did I go from not being able to even get out 1 girly one on my knees to now being able to do more than 1 'proper' one and when did it happen?  I don't even know why I decided to do one on my toes rather than my knees but before I knew it I'd done it gotta say that I am so damn proud of me!

Oh I noticed another thing this week (with the help of others pointing it out to me), my body shape has changed - in a positive way :).  I'm thinking its the weight sessions (body composition) or maybe its just that I am holding my head up higher these days due to being HAPPY!

Anyway its time to call it a night as I have a play date with Kerri tomorrow and I can't wait.  I feel as though the universe sent me an Angel just when I needed one most. 

Will blog again soon. xox

Read more "Day 5,Week 5 - Aim to Change"

Day 2, Week 4 - Aim to Change

I lost 700grams this week which is better than a kick up the butt!

Today my Step Dad went in to have surgery and as waiting is not something I am too good at I kept myself busy by walking the kids to school, cleaning the house, shopping and then cooking!  Yes, you read that right COOKING!!

Minestrone Soup (thanks to Kerriann for the Recipe)

Serves 4:

Nutritional Information per serve

317 calories / 1326kj

10.6g Fat
14.8g Protein
36.9g Carbohydrates

Ingredients:
(Thinly Sliced/Diced Vegetables)
1 Leek
2 Carrots
2 Celery Stalks
1 Zucchini
1 cup of Green Beans
2 tablespoons Olive Oil
1 tbs Mixed Herbs
400g can of diced tomatoes
400g can of Cannellini Beans
50g Pasta: Plain, dry
6 cups of Chicken (Salt-Reduced)

Method:

Place Vegetables and Oil in Pot and Heat through until sizzling, then put on lid and sweat off.  Add tomatoes, herbs and stock bring to the boil and then simmer for 30 minutes.  Add Beans and Pasta bring to the boil and reduce to simmer for 10 minutes.

Serving Suggestion:

Garish with grated parmesan cheese and parsely (additional calories).

Chicken Porcupine Meatballs

You can find the recipe here at Taste.com
 
Serves 4:

Nutritional Information per serve
333 calories / 1394kj
10.6g Fat
25.0g Protein
32.7g Carbohydrates

Last but not least was some Banana Honey Muffins and the recipe for this you can find on the back of the packet when you buy it at the supermarket.  Cheating I know, but hey...."A packet is a packet regardless" LMAO!!

Well anyway I am exhausted as it has been a very long and emotionally draining day BUT I am happy to report that the surgery went well, long but well....phew!

Read more "Day 2, Week 4 - Aim to Change"

Day 1, Week 4 of Aim to Change

Tonight I went to boxing and struggled big time...to the point of having to run out and vomitt (well as much as I can with the band anyway - its more like yucky thick saliva.  Sorry for sharing that but its fact).

So at first I put it down to my fitness level dropping from the 4 days off but then I thought about it some more and realised that my food intake today consisted of 4 cups of coffee and 2 party pies with tomatoe sauce - that's it!  I did try to eat a couple of slices of margarita pizza both of which went in and came out again.

I am sitting here now munching on some walnuts but overall I will shamefully admitt that its just not good enough and an epic fail on my part.

My aim for tomorrow is to EAT!

Read more "Day 1, Week 4 of Aim to Change"

Aim To Change...End Week 3

OK Time really needs to slow down because I feel as though I might blink and miss something, where has the past week gone?  Anyway here is a quick update!

EXERCISE:  I have had 4 days off and am looking forward to getting back into it tomorrow.  After Wednesdays Leg PT my knees were not at all happy with me and so resting them was the plan.  Mind you I didn't think it would be for so long but I have survived and to be honest the break from Gym allowed me more time to spend with my family and friends.

FOOD:  Up until yesterday I was doing pretty good, not perfect but ok (even with a special treat of Sticky Date pudding on Thursday - yummy but oh so sickly sweet).  Yesterday however I well and truly blew it!  I am however paying for it today as my tummy is distended and I am not feeling good at all.  The only consolation is that fact that maybe the calories wouldn't have had time to stay in the body....I will just leave that for you to ponder ewww (hehe)!

EMOTIONALLY:  I am feeling strong right now which is fantastic and in part all thanks to the wonderful people I have spent time with in the past week.  And the other part ofcourse is just because I know I'm awesome enough to achieve my goals because I rock!!  LOL How's that for positive thought!

Well on that note, here's me bidding ye all a goodnight.  

Read more "Aim To Change...End Week 3"

Slow Cooked Moroccan Sweet Potatoe, Carrot and Chickpea Soup

Hi all,

Here is a recipe which is based on one that I found at Amy's website - HERE.  (I left out the Oil, added more Corriander, reduced the amount of stock and forgot the lemon juice).

SLOW COOKED Moroccan Sweet Potatoe, Carrot and Chickpea SOUP!

Serves 4:

Nutritional Information per serve

284 calories / 1187kj

2.8g Fat

13.6g Protein

46.3g Carbohydrates

Ingredients:

600 g of Sweet Potato

500 g of Carrots

1 Medium Brown Onions

400 g canned drained Chickpeas

1L of Chicken Stock (Salt-Reduced)

2tsp Cumin Ground

2tsp Coriander

Chilli to taste

2 teaspoon of Minced Garlic (or 2 cloves)

Method:

Place the ingredients into a slow cooker, turn in on (I use Auto-Shift) and let it do its thing until all the vegetables are soft (approx 6 hours).  Either serve chunky like a stew or blend it all together.

Serving Suggestion:

Add a dallop of (light) sour cream, some freash parsley and ground black pepper.  (*additional calories).

Note: 

If you prefer a runnier soup - add another 2 cups of chicken stock when you are blending (I didn't add in the slow cooker as it didn't fit LOL).

I also think that you could stretch this to serve 6 (especially with the additional stock) as the serving size was really generous.

Read more "Slow Cooked Moroccan Sweet Potatoe, Carrot and Chickpea Soup"

A Binge Win, a Realisation and more Study to come!

A Binge Win To Me!

Last night I was chatting to a friend on facebook about 'excess skin' from weight loss and it raised alot of emotions that I thought I had dealt with but now know that I still have more work to do.  The next thing I know I was scoffing down one of Glenn's Almond Finger Bars and a Packet of Bacon Shapes that I took out of the kids snack box and if that wasn't already bad enough I went searching through the cupboard and found a can of sweetened condensed milk!!

So I'm sitting here shoving spoonfuls into my mouth (straight out of the tin) and I decide that I like it better cold so head back to the kitchen so I can put it in a container pop it in the freezer (quicker than the fridge) and eat it later.  In the meantime I would find something else to munch on. 

As I am walking down the hallway I hear a voice say "what the hell are you doing?".  So I enter the kitchen walk straight to the sink, turn on the tap and put the tin under the water and there goes the remaining 3/4 of the tin down the drain rather than in my belly.

I can't even begin to tell you how proud I am of myself....I have never been that strong before - normally I start the binge and I just keep going until its all gone.  Oh and not to mention the wasting of food!

A Realisation!

Todays Daily Challenge was to write down one thing that you love about yourself...

At first I thought "Oh great here goes nothing" but then I stopped and really thought about it and I realised that there wasn't just one thing in particular because I just love being me!  Sure there are things that I would like to change and am working on but overall I wouldn't want to be anyone else but ME =)

More Study To Come!

So I am currently enrolled in the following courses:

Certicate 3 in Fitness (Group/Gym Floor)

Certifcate 4 in Fitness (Personal Training)

Certicate 4 in Therapeutic Massage

Certifcate 3 in Nutrition and Dietetic Assistance

Yoga Teacher Training

NOTE:  I don't know what I'm going to do about my Yoga course at the moment, not because I don't like it but because I just can't afford it. Finances are really tight here at the moment and in order to finalise my graduation I would need to pay $950. Also I had planned on driving to Woodend once a week for the Teacher/Training Class but the cost of petrol put an end to that. I am so frustrated that I am still trying to get this course finished, especially when I am already teaching and am good at what I do! Oh well if its meant to be then it will be and in the meantime I will keep on going.

So anyway, as I was awarded a $1000 grant (yay) for Mum's Returning to Work which expires on June 23, so today I enrolled in more classes which I will start once I complete the ones I am currently doing!

Certificate 4 in Business

Certificate 4 in Training and Assessment

Diploma of Remedial Massage

Diploma of Fitness - OMG who would of ever thought!

I am so excited and just a little stressed LOL!

Well that's it from me for tonight, I am exhausted and my legs are still feeling like Jelly from this mornings PT session - OMG Squatting Calf Raises are a BIARTCH!!

Hmmmm, BIG has only just started and I already have tears streaming down my face - so confronting!

Read more "A Binge Win, a Realisation and more Study to come!"

Day 2, Week 3 - Aim to Change

Well I know I said I wasn't weighing in but I did and the stupid horrible things have gone up by 100grams which sucks BUT at the same time its 'bloat boat' time (LOL - Thanks for the new word Amy) and so I am just going to ignore what it says because after all its only a number and I know it will go down and that I am on the right track!  :oP there take that scales!

Today I decided (well more like my body decided) to take time out to REST!

Yesterday I did my very first Sh'Bam class which I loved and to make it even better I had the wonderful company of my precious friend and new Gym Buddy Kerri - YAY!  I do have to admitt that the knees gave me some trouble in a couple of the moves but I just scaled it back and made it lower intensity!  

So despite not really feeling like venturing out in the cold to go to Boxing I did and still pusehd myself to the limit even though I wasn't feeling 100%.  Yes stupid I know!  By the time I got home I was so exhausted and drained that I fainted - Hence, the reason why today is a rest day. 

Here's a note to myself  - what is it that you tell everyone else?  LISTEN TO YOUR BODY!!  Its a bit hypercritical if you don't take your own advise don't ya think? Huh?  Buck up girly!

Anway enough about that....

This weeks Challenge on the 'Aim Train' is to discuss our strategies on how we keep moving forward when our emotions, excess baggage and other self sabbotaging things try to stop us and I thought that I would share my answers...yes as always its an epic!

Control - For me the internal reflects the external (or is the external reflects the internal either way /either or) so I make sure that everything around me is in order (clean, declutter, to do lists).  "I am in the drivers seat of my life - NO backseat drivers allowed".

Distraction is also a biggie which is especially useful for combatting emotional eating (and helped me quit smoking).  This invloves anything that keeps me busy such as: 

*Playing my Guitar and singing at the top of my lungs - Also a great way to release built up emotions

*Blogging - Writing it down takes it out of my head so that I am clear to assess each 'worry' one at a time

*Drawing, Painting, Beading, Knitting - Anything that lets me 'express' myself

*Exercising - Especially Boxing and Sprinting as they allow me to feel free.

Visualisation is also another technique that I use alot eg. I watch each of my worries, fears, excess baggage dissolve and dissappear OR catch fire and turn to ashes OR I see them being wrapped in a cloak of positivity and transmute from a thing of 'ugliness to beauty'. The mind is so powerful!

Face the Emotion - I also acknowledge when I need to face my emotions and I allow myself to explore them and accept and experience them.  I believe that if we bottle things up for too long that it will turn to dis-ease.  They are a natural part of life and not to be ashamed of.  "I don't hide my pain to save my reputation" 

Scream - One of my favourite things to do when it all gets way too much to handle is going out into a big paddock and screaming my heart out.  I scream until tears stream down my face and then I scream some more until eventually there is nothing left and then I usually laugh!

Quotes/affirmations - These are incredibly powerful for me and everyday I find one quote that 'speaks' to me and I write it down and it becomes my focus for the day! I find that meditating on it really helps because I believe that if you can see it and believe it then you can achieve it!

Laughter is the best medicine - I used to run 'Laughter Circles' where a group of us would all get together and we would laugh....even if we didn't feel like it. We would stand in a circle, hold hands and I would come up with some kind of crazy laugh and when I was done I would squeeze the next persons hand and they would copy and so on and so on. At first it is really hard to let yourself go enough to do it as it really pushes you out of your comfort zone and lets face it if we are in a 'mood' sometimes smiling is hard enough let alone laughing. BUT it really and truly worked, by the end of each session the mood of everyone had lifted dramatically and the laughter was genuine.

I would love for you to try it....here are a coupld of exercises:

1.  Stand in front of the mirror and laugh, not at anything in particular, just simply LAUGH and continue to laugh until you are 'really' laughing!

2.  When you are with your family(or friends) choose a random time to laugh (make it a really wild and silly).  If they look at you wierd stop, wait a few seconds and then do it again.  9 out of 10 times they will end up joining in with you and you will all be 'really' laughing!

Oh maybe I should mention here that most of my family and friends think that I am CRAZY - in a good way ofcourse! I will admitt now that I was laughing as I wrote this Bahahahahahahaha! Bahahahahahaha!

Ok well that's all for now...time for me to go and do sweet nothing for a little while before school tonight - OMGosh I can't believe its my final class...that's another blog in itself!  ;o)

Read more "Day 2, Week 3 - Aim to Change"

Day 6, Week 2 - Aim to change!

So where was I....

Wednesday I did a PT session with Steve which I really enjoyed.  I am now up to the 'big boy' weights and even managed to find my 'high point' which I found to be quite a funny experience.  I don't think my arms have ever shaken (or is it shook?) so much and I was only using 4kg weights.  Well I was until I had to drop to 3kgs to be able to finish the reps (Skull Crushers after 36 Tri Ext's at 15kg - my triceps really don't like co-operating)!  So anyway I have decided that even though finances are really tight I need a weekly PT session so I can focus on some weight training as more muscle burns more fat.

I also doubled up and did a Spin Class with my sister after my PT.  Talk about challenging, my legs were wobbly enough from Tuesdays THT class and our instructor decided to do the NO MERCY program which yes is as gruelling as it sounds!

Thursday I decided to wind things back in order to give my body a rest (and shake things up a little) and so I skipped the Gym and instead went for a 30 minute walk - it was such a glorious day.

Friday I did a group session with IFW at Masons Lane and considering my knee was being a right royal pain in the backside, I still gave it everything I had.  Including, Burpees with a 3kg medicine ball....like they aren't already hard enough!

Today's exercise was a walk with my Mum and my precious boys as well as a play in the park.  It was yet another glorious winter day.

So that's the Exercise side of things which I am happy with, FOOD on the other hand is another story..

Friday was the worst day as I had one of the most delicious Orange and Poppy seed cupcakes I have ever tasted (straight out of the oven and so worth every calorie - thanks Neen).  On top of that we had a family dinner for my Step Dad's birthday which was Creamy Honey Mustard Chicken and Rice (Delicious - thanks Mum) followed by a slice of white chocolate mudcake (thanks Coles hehe) AND Pavlova with strawberry cream and smarties (Thanks Skeet).  Despite it being a total over endulgence I don't feel guilty as it was for a special occassion and not just me binging.

Since I mentioned Binging I will confess to one session this week which I am ashamed off or more to the point annoyed at myself for.  I scoffed a packet of Snakata Sour Cream and Chives Crackers - 416 calories / 78.8g Carbs :(

So anyway thats all for tonight...will update you again soon.

Read more "Day 6, Week 2 - Aim to change!"

Some Information about the Lapband

I have had a few private messages recently from people asking questions about my Lapband and so I decided to write this blog.  I hope that it answers your questions.  If you would like to know more please be sure to leave a comment or send me a message.

Please remember that this is based on my personal journey and experiences only.

What exactly is the Lapband?

The Lapband is a gastric band that is fastened around the upper part of the stomach (similar to putting a watch on your wrist) which creates a small pouch.  Due to this small pouch the amount of food that can be consumed is restricted.  There is also an access port which is connected to the band by tubing.  This port is placed in the tummy wall (close to the surface) and is used to inject saline into the band to make the restriction more or less (saline is removed). 

How much did it cost?

Keeping in mind that I was (initially) banded in 2001 which is now 10 years ago (wow where did the time go?) it cost me $2500* with Private Health Insurance for a minimum of 12 months.  The cost without the insurance was between $8000 - $10,000.    My second band was done under medicare due to it being classed as a medical emergency.

I have heard from friends that have been banded recently that the costs have increased but I can't give exact figures as the costs vary between surgeons.  This link gives some pricing information.

*This cost covered all practitioners involved in the operation itself NOT the hospital expenses (these were covered by my insurance).  Medicare covered the cost of the Anaethetist and the Assistant Surgeon.

Are there any other costs?

Yes.  You will need to have regular follow up appointments with your surgeon of which there is a standard cost and on top of that if you need to have an adjustment (either more or less restriction) there is an additional fee for that but you get a portion back on medicare

I have monthly appointments and it costs approx $30 for a standard consultation (no adjustment).  If I have an adjustment it costs approx $130 but I get $90 back.

How did you make it happen?

After trying diet after diet getting nowhere fast and getting more and more depressed and sicker due to the associated health risks of obesity I finally decided that I couldn't do it on my own and asked one of my friends for the details of her surgeon. 

Paul Dumbrell

(03) 9450 6800

5 Burgundy Street

Heidelberg, Vic 3084

I called to make an appointment and was booked in for an assessment on 20 October 1999.  I was told that I needed to get a referral from my GP and that there was a cost that needed to be paid on the day (I can't remember how much it was and I don't think that it was covered by medicare).

The assesment involved taking my height (173cm) and weight (127.5kg) so that my BMI could be calculated to determine whether or not I was an acceptable candidate.  Mine was 42.6 and I qualified - obviously!  I really don't know what I would of done if I didn't - probably gone home and stuffed myself silly so that I would (sad thought hey). 

They also asked questions about my past attempts at losing weight and general questions about the type of diet and exercise that I was following. 

Then it was my turn to ask questions:  How much does it cost?  What does it involve? When/Where can I have it done? Is it successful for everyone?  and the list goes on and on (I recommend writing a list of questions to take to the appointment with you).

I decided then and there that I was going to have it done and whilst I was gutted at the thought of having wait at least a year, finacially it was my only option.

My insurance started on 29 December 1999 and on the 18 December 2000 I got my letter confirming my surgery for the 8 February 2001 (1 year and 4 months from initial appointment).

In the 2 months leading up to the operation I was booked in to see a Dietician to go through my post surgery diet which I found out consisted of Month 1 = Liquid Only, Month 2 = Transition from Liquid to Solids (in other words mush) and Month 3 onwards = A Learning Game. 

I also attended a seminar where I got to watch a video of the operation being done (hard to do behind my fingers LOL) and listen to the testimonials of successful banders - this was the exciting part.

Did you have to go to councelling?

No, but I would reccomend it as I personally found that as the weight came off more and more issues arose.  

If you have been following my blog then you will know that I still have many weight related issues that I am coming to terms with and learning how to manage.  I think that if I had of gotten help sooner then perhaps I wouldn't still be struggling with these 10 years later. 

Did you have to follow a special diet before the surgery?

No, although I did have to fast before the surgery.

I do know however that my friends that have been banded recently were put on the Optislim diet.  I am not sure if this is the standard for everyone or if it depends upon the individual.

How much weight did you lose?

I lost a total of 56.5kg getting down to 71kg.

How long did it take?

It took just over a year.

Why did you need to have it redone?

Due to my band being too restrictive which caused vomiting my band slipped and a part of my stomach came up over the top of the band to form a pouch.  Because this went so long without being noticed (partly because I didn't say anything and partly because the xrays weren't viewed) a part of my band also eroded into my stomach. 

Slippage is a common problem in the band but can be avoided.  Also the band has a shelf life and so will need to be replaced due to wear and tear at sometime over the years.  I suggest that you write these down on your list of questions to find out more from your surgeon.

Did you experience any other problems?

In 2003 my Port twisted which meant that the surgeon wasn't able to get the needle in to inflate/deflate the band.  I was admitted in for day surgery on 10 June 2003 and needed to be cut open to have it untwisted and reimbedded into the muscle wall.  The worst part about it all was that I was pregnant at the time and so I wasn't able to be put fully to sleep.  Now that is an experience I never want to relive ewww!

Would you recommend it? 

For sure!  But only IF you have tried every thing else first.

There are also other weightloss surgery's out there that could be more suited to your situation so be sure to research all the options.  HERE is a website that provides some good information.

What other advise do you have?

Don't rely on the band to do all the hard work, help it by following a good nutrition plan and exercising.  Not only will it mean that you will achieve your goals quicker but you will also be healthier in both mind and body and TONE the skin as you lose which will help to 'reduce' the amount of excess skin.  If you find that you lack motivation get yourself a personal trainer so that you have the additional support - pay in advance so that you are more likely to go to your sessions.

You can view details about my current surgeon Peter Nottle HERE (I changed because he was closer).

More information on the Lapband HERE

NOTE:

On a more personal note I have to say that this blog has been really good therapy for me as I have realised that even though I have put on 14.1kg from my lowest weight I have still come so far from the girl that I was 10 years ago!

Weight Then = 127.5kg, BMI Then = 42.6
Weight Now =   85.4kg, BMI Now = 28.5

Weight Loss (based on current figures) = 42.1kg

Why have I put on weight if I still have the Lapband?

When I was pregnant I had all the fluid taken out of my band so that I could get in enough nutrients.  I put on a total of 10kgs after having both babies. 

I managed to lose it again but then I had the band slippage/erosion and once again I had all the fluid taken out and discovered that I still had no will power (need I say more).

When they put in the new band they put in a bigger one which means it takes more adjustments for it to get to the same restriction that I had previously.  At the moment I have very little restriction but I am gradually getting it increased so that I have a little bit more assistance on my journey. 

There was a time that I thought of it as 'cheating' and was ashamed that I needed it to help me lose weight.  But now I am proud to be a bander and know that it wasn't the easy way out - its just a different way!


I have every confidence that I will once again reach my goals.  I have found my will power in the quote "nothing tastes as good as being skinny feels" and my motivation in the fact that "there are no excuses you just do it".

Read more "Some Information about the Lapband"