I've been slack I know...

Holy Cow, the last time I posted anything in here it was like Day 5 of the 1MKC and now the 10 week challenge is well and truly done and dusted.  I knew that I hadn't posted in a while but I didn't realise that it had been THAT long!  The only excuse I have is that life had been crazy busy and I was exhausted and of late not really up to much of anything,  let alone trying to string a sentence together.

To cut a long story short (well shorter) my knee op has been and gone (7 weeks this coming Wednesday) and recovery has been slow, painful and frustrating to say the least BUT despite all this there has been positives and progress is being made.  

The funky leg brace that I had to wear day and night for 4 weeks

and...days only for 5 weeks.

I am still technically supposed to be wearing the brace until my Quad strength increases (the reason I can't lift my leg), but it's been hurting so I have taken it off and actually I feel that I have made much more progress without it as my muscles have had to work harder to support me.

Dressing - I wonder what it looks like underneath?

Just one of the fun and games associated with showering. 

 I had a cankle :(

9 days post op...dressing is now off No more garbage bag showers and granny washes. 

At this point the brace still needed to stay on (no knee bending other than physio) and there was still no weight baring and no driving.  Pain was (still is, although not as much) being controlled with good meds and despite my frustration levels being high I kept on 'trying' hard to stay positive and not over do anything so that my recovery wouldn't have any set backs.  

Considering that they removed a piece of bone from the outer side of my leg and moved (and screwed) it to the inner side, it looks pretty good.

3.5 weeks post op

The wound looked good and I no longer had a cankle.  The brace still had to stay on during the day but I was allowed to take it off to sleep (whoo hoo).  At this point I was allowed to slowly start increasing the bend and the weight bearing but both in very small increments.  Still no driving allowed.  Pain had eased enough to be able to cut back (just a little) on the happy pills. Frustration levels were still high and despite having the flu I managed to stay positive. 

Depite feeling incredibly ill I think the flu probably come at a good time because it stopped me from pushing too much and hindering my recovery. 

My knee today

I can now bend the knee, I can weight bare, I can walk 5 -10 steps without my crutches and I can lift my foot off the floor when my knee is bent.  Pain has increased due to doing more but I am managing to control it with meditation and rest and only using my med's when really needed.  The biggest negative however, is that I cannot lift my leg when fully extended which means I am still not allowed to drive.

Luckily, I have a little scooter to get me around and even though the battery life isn't that great (I have had 3 occasions where I have needed to be rescued, yes go on you can laugh, my rescuers did), it helps me to get the boys to and from school and gives me a little bit of freedom to go for a 'walk' if I need some me time.

On the day of the operation (14th of March) I weighed in at 83.5kg and now I am 87.1kg (a 3.6kg GAIN).  I did so well for the first 4 weeks and managed to maintain my weight despite not being vigilant (and it being Easter) with my nutrition, but complacency set in and whamo up went the scales.  Needless to say that I am once again really uncomfortable in my own skin and feeling very much like a good year blimp.  I have to say though that considering my activity level has gone from manic to pretty much non existent, the gain could of been much much worse.  

Up until the operation my nutrition was at the better end of the scale and my training was AWESOME.  I was so happy with how much my overall health had improved and with the help of my 3 incredible trainers, Steve, Rolando and Craig I was kicking goals. I loved that each of them gave something different to my training that helped to keep me pushing to reach my full potential and I really miss it.

Anyway, the way I see it is that I could wallow in self pity and play the poor me game OR I can stop the sooking and focus on all the positives.  Hmmm, what will I choose??  

I won't lie to you, there has been times in the past 6 weeks that throwing in the towel seemed like a good option but my Mum (my strength) reminded me that us Hurst girls are not quitters and so as hard as both of them can be, I choose positivity and a healthy lifestyle.

And now with all of that said and everything else put behind me and used as a life lesson,  here I am at Day 1 of getting my life back on track.

*Alarm Bells - Negative Alert*  I just caught myself say the word AGAIN very sarcastically as I wrote the above line and have had to stop and give myself a pep talk.  

Yes I am 'back' at Day 1 'again', but does it really matter how many times I have to start again if I am continuing to not give up??   In short, NO it does not.  

I have not failed.  I have just found 10,000 ways that won't work ~Thomas Edison

Failure doesn't mean you are a failure.  It just means you haven't succeeded yet ~Robert Schuller

Failure is only the opportunity to begin again more intelligently.  ~Henry Ford

Your attempt may fail, BUT never fail to make an attempt.

Here's my plan...

Good Nutrition

I will STOP binging on a block of chocolate every night.  If I really feel like a chocolate I will allow myself a 'mint pattie'.

I will STOP skipping meals.

I will make healthier meal options.

I will not allow my emotions to destroy my hard work

Exercise

3 sessions per week ( 2 on my own & 1 P/T)

I am so lucky that Craig (NexgenFitness) is willing to come here to train me.  So far I have done 2 sessions with him and they were tough.  It's amazing what you can do without using your legs, you just need to think outside the square.

Ideally I would love to be able to lose 3.6kg in 4 weeks (by the end of May) but I really think that would be too much pressure, so for now I will be happy to just lose anything rather than put it on.

I also really really want to be able to lift my leg so that I can start driving again but I know that if I put too much pressure on myself that I will make things worse rather than better.  In order to combat that I plan to just continue doing my physiotherapy exercises and hoping for the best.

Anyway that's it for now, I will try my hardest to keep this updated more often.

Wish me luck xox