Sunday, March 20, 2011

Let the 'Genesis' Challenge begin...

As you can tell by the title I have decided to take on another challenge.  Whilst it is a Genesis challenge, I am not 'officially' part of it ($$$) but will still be going through the motions in order to get myself back on track and to also support Marianne who is an official participant (and who is going to whoop everyones butt because Kerriann and I are going to help by whooping hers Bahahahahahaha).

The past week has been absolute hell for me as being sick has meant my training suffered and me being an emotional eater turned to food.  Why do I continue to do it when I know it only makes me feel worse?  I really am my own worst enemy and it is such a vicious cycle.  I eat because I want comfort because I feel crap, then I feel crap because I eat crap, then I eat more crap because I feel crap that I ate crap GRRR!!  As a result of abusing my body with 'crap' food my stomach as been so bloated and sore (because of no crap - too much information I know but I was on a roll LOL) that last night I resorted to taking some laxatives which thankfully have helped a little - ahhhhh! 

I am so unhappy in my own skin at the moment and even though I am uncertain that I will ever get to a place where I am 100% happy with myself, I at least want to regain some of the feelings that I had only a few months ago - when I was feeling 'lean and tall' rather than 'fat and frumpy'.

I was looking back over some of my photos last night and found one of me in July 2009.  I can remember how totally disgusting I felt back then to the point that I was abusing my body by either not eating or eating and purging or, the list of abuse goes on and on.  Now I look at it and although I know that I was 'skinny fat (no muscle tone) and not healthy' I 'like' the shape and size of my body and have decided that it is what I want to aim for. I figure that I have been there before and so I CAN DO IT again, although this time I want to achieve it the HEALTHY way and enjoy it when I get there.

WHERE I WANT TO BE
Weight = 73.5kg, Bust = 94cm, Waist = 89cm, Hips = 108cm  

WHERE I AM
Weight = 83.5, Bust = 101cm, Waist = 99cm, Hips = 118.5cm

So tomorrow it all begins and whilst I am still feeling pretty ordinary (Throat and Lung Infection) I am determined to get back on track and turn things around and so in true Tash style I decided to jump straight into the deep end and book in my first PT with Steve - nervous much!!

MY LONG TERM GOALS:

Ultimately I would like to be 69kg which would give me a BMI of 22, this is the middle of my healthy range of 64kg - 74kg.  In order to achieve this I will lose 14.5kg.  My aim is to lose 1/2 to 1kg per week. 

BF% within 25% - 30% - I will lose 12 - 17% of body fat.

SM% within 35 - 40% - I will increase my skeletal muscle by 10 - 15%.

In order to achieve the same sort of figure that I had in July 2009 I need to reduce my Bust, Waist and Hip measurements by approximately 10cm each.  I will reduce my measures and be a comfortable Size 12.

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I welcome all messages and comments that are positive and encouraging. If however you do have some criticism please make sure that it is constructive rather than destructive. Much Love, Light and Peace XOXO Tash!