Monday, May 11, 2020

Feb 17th to 23rd 2020

Okay, I know that this is like 3 months ago now, but here it is anyway!

Monday 17th...

One week before the big O!

Today was one of THOSE days!  


Remembering, we still do not have proper plumbing, which adds a whole other level of blergh kinda shittyness!

It was school photos day (of which I prepaid $100+ for), BUT Jazz had a viral infection, and Ace had severely sprained his thumb, so both did not go to school.  In addition, Mark had 'Bali Belly' AND I (me, me, me!!!) really needed to get a shit tonne of stuff done before OP day!

So, first thing in the 'am', I call the school to ask what time photos are.  As always they give me the run around; I swear they couldn't organise a root in a brothel!  I finally get the info, and we set alarms for 3 different photo times...yep, 3 different freaking times!  You'd think considering the circumstances, but no, reception is a major bitch!

Jazz is up first at 9.30am and the plan is for Mark to head off to do his fasting blood test for cholesterol, come back to pick up Jazz and take him to school, so that I can go to my 9.40am appointment in Darley...yes, opposite ends of town.  Long story short, Mark ends up on the shitter and can't get back in time so I have to juggle (drop Jazz and then drive - AT the speed limit, rather than my usual way under it).  Thankfully, Mark was able to pick him up after the photos so I didn't have to worry about being in two places at once.

So, I go to docs and get enough scripts to open my own pharmacy...melatonin, primulut - the stop period stuff, tamaze, targin...list goes on and on!

From docs I make a quick trip home to check that stuff is getting done...I mean, I did gardening and managed housework when I was running to the loo; just gotta man the frig up as I don't have time to be compassionate today.  Bitchy I know but seriously stressed AF!

Give list of jobs that NEED doing, instructions for sibling pics, and off I go to try and find some button front tops for after the op.  Yes, during the packing check I realised I had only gotten PJs, a summer dress and two kimonos...hmmm not nearly enough!

The Hospital Op Shop (HOS) only had limited items and mostly old fashioned items, so I also visited the salvos and there I found myself some good tops at a bargain; mind you not as much of one as compared to the HOS.

After shopping, I got home and jack shit had been done, worse yet the freaking sibling photo form was still sitting on the table...like WTF!!!  Okay, so they had pics done, but how will the photographer know who they are and what pack we want huh?  Luckily they were still down there to drop off the form and explain what happened *waste of my time grrr*.

Then it was home again to run around like a headless chook.  To be honest, it wouldn't have been so bad if doing a load of washing wasn't such an arduous chore; filling the machine meant running to the back yard to turn on garden tap (Mark cleverly set it up that way, otherwise I would have no washing machine at all), running back inside to make sure hose was in the machine properly, and then running back out again just before it reached the fill limit (this got done for the rinse cycle too :/ ).  Mind you, it was better than not having a machine at all, so I should be grateful really!

The afternoon consisted of more photos and another trip to the doctors as a family, where Mark didn't put his hand up and mention he was unwell.  This pissed me well and truly the f^@/ off as I am sick of telling him that if he doesn't look after himself; which means taking medication when supposed to AND following doctors orders, then he can't properly look after ME!  Can't half tell I was in a mood hey, but seriously so much to do in very little time and a valid point!


Tuesday 18th...

You know that mood I was in yesterday? Well, it's not much better today!

Oh thats right, TTOTM is due this week which explains it I guess!

Plumbers arrived at 8am, so we are hoping that when we get back today we will have running hot AND cold water inside.  It would be great if I had a laundry sink again too.  Did I tell you that because I've had times of umm...running to the loo, we set up our bed out in the bungalow.

We were in Williamstown by 9.45am today to see the specialist about the Lapband Op.  $220 (well, I get $75 back) and 15 minutes later...yup, holy crap, forms for op were filled in and we were on the way to St.Albans for the next appointment.

Today was HIDA scan day.  It was relatively painless, other than the part where he put the canula in and I left a puddle, yes a puddle of blood on the floor.  Oh, and having to drink a horrible think warm milk drink.  

This huge machine was Bulk Billed...go figure!

Results came back as all clear which is good, but means still no answer...until the gynocologist makes appointment anyway, now I am even more convinced its bowel endometriosis!

We got home just on lunch time and plumbers were still working...in the pouring rain and mud!  They have labelled our place...the house from hell as apparently the pipes are as old as the house.  BUT...we have an inside toilet and shower again.  Washing maching taps...unfortunately NOT!  They will need to come back and fix that, and also give us plaster walls and a sink again.

I'm feeling very anxious tonight as my ocd is in overdrive...our plumbing still not being 100% fixed isn't helping let me tell you.  On top of the plumbing we have appointment after appointment which means limited time at home to pack, cook ahead and just generally get our home the way I like it...which then means it is cutting into the quality time I need with my family.  Gggaaahhh!


I know its just fear raising its head, and we all know that I won't let it win, but in this moment of now, it sure makes it hard to breathe! 

Wednesday 19th...

Today we were up and off to the RMH for an 8.30am appointment.  We gave the boys the day off as one of their mates had stayed over (long story) and didn't have his uniform or books and well, it was just easier to give them the day off, so they came with us.

It was closer to 9.30am when I was called in, by Deans assistant Kelly; the skinny girl with big teeth, big glasses and an annoying American accent.  My heart sank initially at it being her, but thankfully Dean came in later.  They ran through the op and told me that I would be left with 'fat knees' after this round, but they would fix them up next time by making it a slightly bigger and more complicated operation.  I asked about using my dog ears (flabby bits from where drain tubes were in for my tummy tuck) and unfortunately he doesn't think he can fix them for me, as part of the prophylactic process anyhow.  What he did say is that what I really need, is a full body lift.  Hmmmm, is it worth it really?  I mean I'm 45 and have grown to love me as I am.

Anyway, Monday is all set to go!  Eekkk shit is getting real!

Thursday 20th...

Plumper came back again today, this time to fix laundry taps! We still have to run a hose out the window for the waste water, but thank goodness theres no more running back and forth to the backyard to run the tap.

Got TTOTM today!  Oh did I tell you, I can't take the stop period tablets due to the risk of it causing blood clots?  So, not ideal for the op and thats why today the bloodgates (see what I did there?) of hell are a flowing *sigh*.

Today Mark had his urology appointment in Ballarat.  It was at 2.30pm, and he was called in at 4.30pm O.M.G!!!  Worst part was it wasn't helpful - AT ALL!

Friday 21st...

Another day of running around.

No school for Ace as thumb too sore (did I tell you he sprained it on the trampoline?!?), so off to doctors who confirmed its definitely not broken, but just needs a good brace.  Brace bought, bank account empty, but fingers crossed it helps.

Pic taken before the fancy brace!

Boys were supposed to go to Glenns this weekend, but we didn't hear from him again.  Haven't heard from him since the whole Jo thing...blows my mind how he can choose a child abusing skank over his own kids.  As I've said before, its his loss.

Worked out well though, as we brought Hosannas contact forward, as I will either still be in hospital, or just be getting home next Friday and contact then will just be too hard!

Oh did I tell you we have full plumbing inside?  Unfortunately though, we don't have plaster on the laundry wall OR a laundry sink :(



Saturday 22nd...

Today was massage day!  Oh how I needed and deserved that.  I could of definatey had a double though!  I wonder how long before I'm 'allowed' a massage after my surgery, I'm guessing I won't be able to lie on my tummy for a while.

Apart from a few more boring things to tick off my to do list, I have 'almost' reached the point of surrender!  Not long now...

Sunday 23rd...

Aaarrrrrrrrrhhhh - add every expletive deletive you can think off - yup even the one that makes me want to wash my own mouth out with soap!

Yup I'm sharing a snotty nosed red eyed crying pic because its real!

Plumbing has gone AGAIN!  On a plus, plumber is here checking it out BUT it is not a quick fix and not going to be sorted before I go in to hospital tomorrow, and who knows about when I come home!

To say I am not dealing real well right now is an understatement!  It is one thing to know that after tomorrow I will need to give up control and just surrender to the process, allowing myself to be completely vulnerable and reliant upon everyone else when things are organised, but THIS just adds a whole other level of stress!  

I mean, I need a toilet INSIDE FFS (yes, it's a positive we have one at all, but omg it is not going to be an easy walk to the loo...see pic for why)!  

Need to breathe! Need to surrender!  Need to pray, trust, scream, cry, drink a bottle of tequila...NEED PLUMBING ISSUE FIXED!!! 

Okay so I could be feeling nervous which has heightened all my emotions.  But, everything has been ticked off my list, I've updated my will and have everything packed and out in the car ready for an early start tomorrow.

See you all on the flip side hey, with a majorly reduced risk of my boobs trying to kill me.  

P.S.  I will post a separate blog to show you what I packed and go through my checklist.

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I welcome all messages and comments that are positive and encouraging. If however you do have some criticism please make sure that it is constructive rather than destructive. Much Love, Light and Peace XOXO Tash!